Cairo...Part 1

A few years ago I “met” a young woman (through Facebook), born and raised in Cairo. We have carried on many conversations throughout that time, and I came to learn that she is not only emotionally strong, but strong-willed! When considering who to interview, she was one of the first to come to mind. (The only changes I have made in her answers are minor, spelling, for ease of reading.) And now, I'd like to introduce my friend Nan from Cairo...

Thanks so much for agreeing to be interviewed. I'm looking forward to this! I think my first question to you would be this: You are a young woman in the chaotic city of Cairo, which is going through a tremendously tough time right now, relatively newly married and with a baby boy. Do you consider your life in Cairo to be much different from life for any other young woman in other large cities?

I can't really tell whether it is different or not .. I didn't live much with the same circumstances in any other city, but as you said we are going through real hard times now. Marriage was somehow going peacefully at the beginning, although working and taking care of my home were not easy, but it was ok and I was managing. Things started to get harder with the revolution that occurred 6 months after...

Being married has magnified the trouble.

How so?

First of all, I am responsible about home expenses and with the continuous increase of prices of everything, worries rise in the air about are we going to be able to live at the same level tomorrow? Will we be able to provide our son a good comfortable life? Given that I stopped working and I am home since pregnancy, for about a year and a half now, and my husband is supporting us all. God bless him. Moreover, when I was single I didn't care much about safety – though Egypt before revolution was the safest city you can ever walk around, even at 3 am – but now it is gone. I only go out with my husband or to my mother and in laws homes, otherwise no, and I never go out after sunset. It is not safe anymore. Thugs and troubles and protests are everywhere and almost on a weekly basis.

Cairo is a tough city, an expensive one, you must keep running to be able to live good. And we are already doing our best.

When you said, however, that you can now only go out with your husband or to your mother and in-laws homes, what do you mean? The safety aspect, in what way? As a female, or is it the cover/no-cover?

No no I didn't mean that. The government might be Islamist, and hijab is worn by the majority of Muslim girls in Egypt BUT there is nothing such as Afganistan burka or anyone forced to wear it by the government. The majority of girls wear fashionable hijab, and I actually prefer to call it ehtesham which means conservative clothes, like nuns for example.

I meant about the SAFETY. The streets of Cairo aren't safe any more. I admit it – during the ruling of Mubarak and the tyranny of the police, we were living safe. The police were sometimes crossing limits but to keep the lowlifes and thugs away from the streets.

What do people want? Safety and food .. freedom is a luxury.

Even though obviously you adore your son and love your husband, do you miss your working life?

TERRIBLY. I had been working from 2000 until 2011, over ten years, reaching a high position as I was the head of the research and market intelligence department in a reputable government entity. I used to work with chairmen and CEOs and ministers, and suddenly all of this is gone. I discovered that I was with a baby and not just pregnant but high risk pregnancy because I had a fibroid that may cause abortion, so I had to stay home under medical supervision (luckily my husband is an OBGYN). So after going out every day, I just stayed home to cook, clean, take care of my hubby and my baby.

One of the things that annoys me the most is that I am used to having my own money, spending it as I wish. Now I have to ask, but I consider myself lucky because my hubby is not that kind of man who considers that his wife's salary is his. And actually I don't ask for money – he gives me what I need even before asking. Other women suffer. I had a friend whose husband takes her salary and gives her an allowance, barely enough for her needs, and makes an issue if she spends on something for her. There are women who stay home and have to be dependant on their husbands. They suffer because their men use money as a way to control and oppress them.

I also miss the dynamism of the day, meeting people, knowing stories of other people, events, going here and there, attending meetings and conferences. But now I have a fixed schedule. Routine is killing me, and there is nothing much to do. That is why I love virtual games. They take me to other colorful places. I hate to be dependant, but my husband always says "you are paying your share by taking care of our son instead of putting him in a day care and spending money, and he might get ill" and so on. One thing I have to tell you. Day care here is usually an apartment in a building with no sun or playground. It is more like a place to lock kids till their parents are back from work, and honestly I won't feel good if my baby is in one of these. Anyway, it may be a matter of time, then I'll go back. Work isn't my life, but staying at home isn't the same either.

Thinking back to the "revolution" in Cairo, when the citizens took to the streets and accomplished an amazing feat. In this day and age of instant communication and social networking, what was it like to be cut off from the world? Would you describe it more as scary or exciting?

No one ever thought that this call for a demonstration on the 25th of January will ever work. Many did it before and failed. We lived 18 days of constant thrill, fear and loads of waiting. Every home in Egypt barely got any sleep. After the first week of the revolution, all government entities asked the employees to stay home because there might be attacks on the buildings, and during this chaos you barely knew who was innocent or not. Add to that the opening of the prisons by Hamas and helped by the Muslim brotherhood to free prisoners, and continuous attacks on police stations -- usually by thugs and criminals -- and you would hear that many people were attacked on the streets, not from the revolutionists but from thugs and criminals released onto the streets.

Among all of this, communication was out. We were blacked out. Thank god there were landlines to call our families and friend, and we sat in front of the tv not moving. It was scary especially that my hubby had to go to work. One morning he woke me up and told me "we must leave now." He took me to my mother and went to work; he then went to his mother because she is living alone. So I keep waiting for a phone call on the landline at the end of the day. Cutting communication was the stupidest thing someone can do because it encouraged people to go more and more in the streets to know what is going on live – after all tv doesn't broadcast everything.

Such a time. I didn't sleep or eat. I was just praying for the safety of everyone I know.

The world has just recently gone through (more) troubling times due to religion. Without making this religious or political, can you briefly tell me what it means to you to be Muslim at a time when the world is so afraid of the very word?

Well … since 9/11, I went to Europe three times and to America once. In France, they were suspicious, looking at me as if I was carrying a bomb or something; in Germany, looking down at me as if I am from another planet; in Greece and USA, people were friendly. Honestly I don't think much about this issue as I live in a city of Muslim majority. But when I do think about it, I feel troubled, uncertain about people's reaction, and hate the generality. If I was not open-minded, I would say "all Jews are bad" or "all Christians are mean," but I don't because in Islam we believe in all religions and all prophets and I cannot just judge a person by his/her religion. We have this verse in Qur'an: “lakom dinakom we leya dini". It means, you have your religion and I have mine ... everyone is free to have his/her belief and we shouldn't discriminate each other according to that. That may be a bit theoretical but this is how I think.

I think you noticed that once I wrote that I am Muslim and proud because some game friend on facebook posted a picture of Muslim women in some whatever country carrying signs saying we hate Jews. She said that we teach our children hatred at schools. I told her that every religion has fanatics, but she insisted on her opinion. Fine. I showed her something that in Europe there was the 30 years war between protestant and catholic, they killed each other and hated each other, so now what? Will I say that they are bad? Oh no, not at all.

Tell me about Cairo...

Cairo is a savage city .. honestly I don't like living in it. It is crowded because so many people have immigrated from less fortunate governorates. The Mubarak regime has only cared for the capital and left the rest poor and with no opportunities. Traffic jams all the time, continuous increase of prices, pollution ... it requires a fighting heart to be able to live here. This is how I see Cairo from the perspective of someone living here.

But if we talk about someone coming for a few days, there are loads of attractions that are of interest. Egypt has gone through lots of eras, and you can find all types of museums. Moreover, Islamic Egypt is basically in Cairo, with all the mosques and palaces and old buildings. Add to that Giza pyramids, and Nile cruises at night – they are the best thing you can ever do. It is magical!

(To be continued...when she tells us about what do, see and eat there!)